1. |
Simcha
02:36
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It’s like happiness, but not quite.
I’m not swayed by circumstance, one foot on each side of the fucking fence. What is love without despair? Where do I fucking go from here?
Still looking for the light, but I can’t seem to find. Still trying to do what’s right. I can’t give up this fight.
Even though I’m broken, this one thing I still have. Looking forward, looking back, I turn to what’s ahead. May my choices build the strength of who I’m meant to be. Even though it’s not happiness, it’s where I’m meant to be.
What the fuck is joy?
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2. |
When's It Gonna End
01:24
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When’s it gonna end? Will we ever stop the back and forth? Friends til the end, but I think it’s dead and good now.
You’re to fucking good for me. I’m so messed up that all I want is more.
Pick my head up. “Stop being so typical.” When I’ve got my heart in this, it’s hard to see who you really are and that’s fucking fake. Yeah, down to your fucking core. You’re self-obsessed, self-centered, and now I see it more and more.
Someone please give me the vision to view the real you, to just fucking leave it and be through. I can’t keep beating myself up just for you. You’re not worth it, never have been. So please tell me: when’s it gonna end?
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3. |
Truly Alone
01:27
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Disconnection. Fascination. Misdirection. Motivation.
Reality is a revolving door that’s spinning around me. Is it narcissism or disconnection that won’t let me be?
How do I find connection? I’m lonely in my skin, can’t wrap my head around it, either way I can’t win.
My fascination is all I have. You don’t get me. I don’t get you. This misdirection, holding me back. Change my point of view.
You don’t get me, I don’t get you, an outsider in a crowded room.
Motivate me to understand you, an outsider in a crowded room.
Truly Alone.
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4. |
Born To Deny
02:37
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Stuck inside my head, drowning in a sea, it’s all so poisonous, this death inside of me.
It’s in my nature to burn you alive.
I’m just a creature, born to deny.
Sometimes it comes spewing out, crashing like the sea. Now I see the consequence just from being me. A trail of disfigurement is all I have to show. I’ll show you my love, share my life, you’d better be prepared ‘cause all I got is strife.
I’ve got the best intentions while I’m shoving in the knife. I promise to make you better, when I’m no longer in your life. And no, you’ll never thank me. You’ll only ever hate me.
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5. |
Predator
01:42
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It’s not okay. What you did was wrong. Own up to it, like the man you think you are. You should be afraid. You under estimate the power of a woman scorned. Try to put her in her place. You can be sure she will rise above your hate. Take your discontent. Take all your fucking rage and push it away.
I will not clap for you. I will not vote for you. I will not cater to your self-serving, narcissistic attitude. You shouldn’t have said it. You shouldn’t have done it. I can’t believe that there’s a locker room full of you.
Eat shit, sex predator.
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6. |
Don't Buy The Lies
02:10
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Age matters not, but the question remains: Should old bones not be regarded the same as those that have not felt as much weight, stood all of time’s tests, been through as much pain?
Subtext ignored, caveat disregarded. I don’t need the small words to spell out the bigger picture.
Age matters not, but the question remains, should old bones not be regarded the same?
Is the purpose of your message still there, when excluded are those whose choice bears the weight, perpetuates the cycle. The reason this message is even projected goes beyond those who are affected.
It will not discriminate.
It will not know the age of its user.
The concern is not who is struck next.
The concern is not who will die next.
Don’t buy the lies.
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7. |
Light & Dark
01:10
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This black hole sucked me in. I feel myself going under, darkness seeping in. I’m sick of all the sadness, so tired of all the pain. Looking for a release, wanna rid myself of shame.
Just give me some catharsis in all my dark days. Just give me some hope—things won’t remain this way. Give me some self-confidence to stop playing this game. I owe it to myself to live through all this pain.
I want to be the remedy to my own self-hate
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8. |
30
01:40
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Slowly coming to the realization that I am truly alone. A sad but sterile truth. Being myself is not enough. When in life did I become so empty? When in life did I become so dense?
They say our happiness is measured through relationships, through love. Well then, if that’s the truth, I’ve got thirty years and nothing to show for it.
I’m sick of being shit at love, a flaky friend, a neglectful daughter, an alien. All I’ve wanted was just to love and be loved, but I’m coming to find that it’s one of my flaws. I’ve been called a narcissist more than once. The world only exists for me.
I truly hate being me.
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9. |
Misery and Company
01:52
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Your life’s a fucking secret, a mystery to me. You were the greatest company to my misery. So strange that you’re a stranger, when I though I truly knew you. Can you even tell me, who the fuck are you?
Do you even know? A different version for a different girl who probably feels like she’s your goddamn kindred soul. Is it all a game to you, a bait and switch, your secret lives? Am I just a pawn to you, a small piece of your fucked up puzzle?
Keep me in the dark. Keep saying that you care. You say you want the best for me, but you’re afraid to share the things in life that matter, these things that you hold close. I thought that I was one of them, but that was just a joke.
Tell me that you love me, that I’m your only friend. If you’re not gonna love me, then watch me bleed you dry.
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10. |
Under His Eye
02:06
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We rats in this maze can go anywhere, as long as we stay inside. Freedom is relative, like everything else. Hope in futility.
Under his eye you rape, degrade, and lie. Under his eye I have no rights. Under his eye the future is bleak. Under his eye the future is a nightmare.
A prisoner of my womb. My body is your domain. Let my soul be redeemed while my body becomes a temple.
My limbs mean nothing, my eyes need no sight. Just a warm womb to grow, while my soul rots inside.
Under his eye you rape, degrade, and lie. Under his eye I have no rights. Under his eye the future is bleak. Under his eye the future is a nightmare.
Blessed be the meek for they shall inherit the earth.
There has to be an "us", because there is a "them".
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Safe Inside Records San Diego, California
San Diego-based hardcore record label
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